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Fw: Memo found near the break room in one of the caves.
> MEMORANDUM
> Monday, October 22, 2001 @ 8:17am
>
> FM: Bin Laden, Osama
> TO: All Cavemates
> RE: The Cave
>
> Hi guys.
>
> We've all be putting in long hours lately but we've really come together
as
> a group and I love that. Big thanks to Omar for putting up the poster that
> says "There is no 'I' in 'team'" as well as the one that says "Hang in
there
> baby." That cat is hilarious.
>
> However, while we are fighting a jihad, we can't forget to take care of
the
> cave. Frankly, I have a few concerns.
>
> First of all, while it's good to be concerned about cruise missiles, we
> should be even more concerned about the scorpions in our cave. Hey, you
> don't want to be stung and neither do I so we need to sweep the cave
daily.
> I've posted a sign-up sheet at the main cave opening.
>
> Second, it's not often I make a video address, but when I do I'm trying to
> scare the most powerful country on earth, okay? That means that while
we're
> taping please don't ride your razor scooters in the background. Just while
> we're taping. Thanks.
>
> Third point, and this is a touchy one. As you know, by edict, we're not
> supposed to shave our beards. But I need everyone to just think hygiene,
> especially after mealtime. We're all in this together.
>
> Fourth, food. I bought a box of Cheez-Its recently and clearly wrote
"Osama"
> on the front and put it on the top shelf. Today my Cheez-Its were gone.
> Consideration, that's all I'm saying.
>
> Finally, we've heard that there may be American soldiers in disguise
trying
> to infiltrate our ranks. I want to set up patrols to look for them. The
> first patrol will be Omar, Muhammed, Abdul, Akbar and Richard.
>
> Love you lots.
> Osama
>
>
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