FW: Scottish Ranchers?

[Heather Flanagan <heflan@wnt.sas.com>]

> -----Original Message-----
> 
> Ventriloquist Cowboy 
> 
> A ventriloquist cowboy walks onto a ranch... 
> 
> Cowboy to Rancher:
> 
> Cowboy:  Is that your dog?
> Rancher: Yup.
> Cowboy:  Mind if I talk to him?
> Rancher: Durn fool, don't you know dogs don't talk.
> Cowboy:  So what's the harm?  May I?
> Rancher: Go right ahead.
> 
> Cowboy to dog:
> 
> Cowboy:     Howdy.
> Dog:     Hello. (Rancher's eyes pop out)
> Cowboy:  Is this your master?  (pointing to the rancher)
> Dog:     Yep, sure is.
> Cowboy:  Does he treat you alright?
> Dog:     Sure does, every day he takes me for a walk, he 
>          feeds me all kinds of great food, and once a 
>          week he takes me to the lake to play.
> 
>         Rancher is standing there dumbfounded.
> 
> Cowboy to Rancher: 
> 
> Rancher: Is that your horse over there?
> Rancher: Yes.
> Cowboy:  Mind if I speak to him?
> Rancher: I know the dog spoke to you, but I know for a 
>          fact that horses can't talk.
> Cowboy:  Well then what would it hurt?
> Rancher: Go right ahead.
> 
> Cowboy to horse:
> Cowboy: Hello.
> Horse:     Hello.
> 
>         Rancher can't believe it.  
>         He stands there with his jaw wide open.
> 
> Cowboy:  Is that your owner?
> Horse:   Yup, sure is.
> Cowboy:  He treat you OK?
> Horse:   Sure, he rides me every day, brushes me down at 
>          the end of the day, and he keeps me in the barn 
>          away from the elements.
> Cowboy:  Sounds good. (turns to the rancher) are those your
>          sheep out here?
> 
> Rancher is beside himself:  
> 
> Rancher: Th-Th-Th-Them sheep out there, they're nuttin but 
>          a bunch of liars!!